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Mom: You're just being obnoxious and mean so that I'll be glad to see you go away to college aren't you?

[Actually yes]
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I have reached the point of sadness where my grandmother came over today and guilt tripped me into leaving the house. To walk her home.

I start radiation next week. I've already met with the radiologist, who wears fugly sweaters and talks way too fast. When I was on the table being x-rayed and CT scanned? All I could think about was this. That's obsession, kids.

I want to go back to school already. I miss school. A lot.
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I kind of wish that my mother were the type I could respect. Instead she dissolves into tears at the slightest thing lately [with, okay good reason] and I am left to hold things together, emotionally speaking. It worries me that I do not particularly like or respect my mother.
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I love my family, but if my mother does not stop smothering me, and calling every half-hour precisely to check up on me, I am going to throw my cell phone in the fucking Hudson river and run away to Australia.

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My grandmother came over today. To keep from getting the cold that's struck down both me and my mother within the last week, she hung a clove of garlic around her neck. Now she's protected from colds [and vampires].


I love my family sometimes. :)
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Mom: Why is Samantha kissing a woman?
Me: *looks* That's not a woman, mom, that's Smith. He's definitely a man.
Mom: But he's got such lovely hair.
Me: Oh you've just got gay sex on the brain.


Wait a minute, I've been watching Queer as Folk all month, and you're the one who sees it everywhere? That's so fucking funny.

Mom: *rolls her eyes and walks away*

Man, I love my mom sometimes.
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Today I went ice-skating for the first time this year. Am still rather stiff and nervous but will get over that. Going again tomorrow. I've figured out that Swinburne is two blocks from school and I can go over there for the afternoon session, right after school if I want to. Will do that a few times this year. See how it works. [My skates still fit, and how cool is that? It's been what, four years that I've used the same ones? Probably more by now.]

I had this long and drawn out argument with my grandmother in which I tried to convince her that not all Palestinians are evil and to stop being so racist. I'll wear her down eventually. Bwahaha. Mostly it's just fun to argue with her.
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I'm back from Brighton Beach. It was wonderful.

We had to get up at 5:30. And I was too excited to sleep, and ended up sleeping about five hours. It took forever to get there, but once we did, it got better. We visited my gran's sister in the hospital [and just about made her day] She is rather cool, and self-reliant, and hates being in the hospital, and having to depend on lots of other people. I understand the feeling perfectly.

I don't think I spoke more than three sentences of English all day, and I loved that. I've decided, I'm going to live close enough to BB to be able to visit, and buy cheap fruit and vegetables [cause there's a market on every corner] and see the ocean after a few minutes of walking.

Speaking of which, I got to run around on the beach like a kid on a sugar high. There were these rocks that extended 50 feet or so into actual ocean, and I climbed those to the very edge [where people were fishing] and felt very adventurous indeed.

Not to mention, we shopped for hours. And bought a lot of food that you can't get in Albany, [though a good half of what they sold in grocery stores my grandmother regularly makes, and better.] and ate unbelievably fattening [though very delicious] street pastries.

I had fun, but it was nice to collapse into my own bed after all of it. [I still want to travel a lot more though.]
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So I've been really busy with school. And haven't had proper time to read, or ramble on in the back of all my notebooks (which is a habit I'm trying to get rid of. I'll make one notebook the "Designated Rants Notebook," but then a week later I'll get bored and start writing in the back of my Latin, or English notebook. This is annoying because then I don't have all my rantings in one place. Am going to end these parentheses now. They are far too long.)

I have a whole long list of fics to read over the weekend. And other things to do such as;

Am going to the cemetery on Sunday, to visit grave of my favorite relative, Great-Aunt Faina. Nice thing about dead relatives is that they don't talk much, but readily listen to me, and let me talk about anything I want to.

Have made tentative plans to hang with Earda. Sometime around this Saturday. Must call her, and arrange proper times.

Have baby-sitting scheduled for 5-8:30PM on Sunday.

Have a ton of EuroHistory reading to get done. But do not mind much, as I have the best teacher. He was talking about his love of reading as a child, and that cemented it. I am now officially his fangirl. (Not in the same way that I like Mr. Dunn of course, as the first is an appreciation of the mind, and the second is an appreciation of the body. Ahem)

Mom and self made chocolate-chip cookies. I helped by licking everything covered in batter. Mother greatly appreciated my help, of course. All right, mother was the one who found the ingredients, and mixed the recipe, but I did some things too. I used the electric mixer to combine the ingredients. And in the middle of squeeing about how cool the damn thing was, I told mother an amusing anecdote about kid who tried to lick the spinning things (for lack of the real name) while they were still moving. It was pretty well-recieved, condsidering I was holding the mixer in my hand at the time.
Cookies are delicious, and fattening. Very yummy.

Last thing I will mention is NaNoWriMo. Dark cloud of 50000 words is hanging over me right now. Am worried, as I can write a lot, with proper motivation, most of the time I'm too tired, or have writer's block. Do not know when I will find time to write.

And keep meaning to write out a detailed plot summary, but have so far not gotten past the prologue( Title of prologue is currently "Prologue".) I plan to name chapters according to what happens in them. Example: In which something happens. Is rather nifty plan, I think. Will sign off now, as I am running out of things to say (write?).


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May 2010

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